Or so claim some senior bio majors evacuated from the building a few minutes ago. They say that their professor told them to get out as soon as they smelled smoke coming from one of the upper floors--other students stood around in puzzlement, and few of the evacuated seemed to be enjoying the all-too-brief break from their academic pressures. "I'd rather be working," an Earth Science professor told us. "Fresh air is highly overrated."

The Bio majors, who were interrupted mid-lab, agree. "Cells are dying," one of them said gravely. A panicky grad student echoed her concerns: "I need to get back. What the fuck?" she exclaimed--thankfully for her overworked, engineering ilk, the building was reopened just a few minutes ago, although nobody could else could give a solid explanation as to why it was evacuated in the first place. We'll have more details as soon as they emerge.

Update: The building services guy at the 119th St. entrance tells Bwog that Mudd was evacuated due to a lab fire on the 3rd floor. The fire didn't spread, but the man said that the university doesn't take any chances as far as chemical conflagrations are concerned. Most reassuring!

Meanwhile, a cop car ran aground on a parked SUV at 119th and Amsterdam, and as of a half-hour ago police were routing traffic through Morningside Drive. The two incidents aren't linked...we don't think.

-ARR

Barnard Fire Safety bribes students to sit through a fire safety video with an iPod nano drawing.



If Barnard girls can't put scarves on lamps for mood lighting or light candles, how will they ever find boyfriends?
More importantly, what genius heats up a pizza in the oven while it's still in the cardboard box?

Oh those Krazy Karman Kids!

A brigade of three fire engines and two support vehicles showed up at Carman tonight around 10:15 to squelch a firey blaze of nothing. According to a few of the dozens of students milling about outside, this is the third or fourth false alarm the building's had in the last two days (and EC's been having them left and right too). A harsh blinking light from a fifth-story window betrayed the source of the genius who pulled the alarm or otherwise caused it to go off.

This has got to cost the University something...

- SEV

Two bemused boys spotted standing outside of Butler, bugged eyes fixed on the burning flyer at right.

One was wielding a cigarette.

"Hey, it's better than studying..."

Update 5:32 PM: Also, it seems that one of the glass doors to Carman has been smashed and covered with police tape. Calm down, guys--we've got a couple weeks to go yet.

Update 9:21 PM: Bwog regrets not titling this post Burning Bush.

"If you're wondering why I keep taking off my shirt, it's because it's flammable"

- Todd Spitz, SEAS '08

It seems as if Columbia has been having a bit of trouble with Fire Safety lately. Yesterday, two unrelated occurrences confirm that maybe we should be worried about the all-consuming wrath-fire after all.

From Bwog Tipster Addison Anderson, on yesterday's EC fire alarm:

After the alarm from the smoke scare on the 14th floor stopped ringing, everyone went back inside. I was walking down the hallway on 14, when I ran into a bunch of firefighters standing outside the Suite of Carelessness. The following exchange ensued:

Firefighter (annoyed): You know, there's a fire, and one of you kids might get hurt.
Me: So they shouldn't have let us all back inside?
Firefighter: ...No.
Me: Because that's what they did, they said we could...
Firefighter sighs and shakes head mournfully, fed up.

Some EC residents are beginning to feel like maybe the University has it in for them. First the non-working water heaters, then the awful elevators, and now this? It makes you wonder...

Next, a same-day dispatch from Bwog staffer Andrew Flynn.

Today was a bad day for fire alarms. One went off in Milbank during my class with Taylor Carman, professor of Philosophy. Carman was already over-time, but he stopped to assess the situation. Unfortunately, the noise of the alarm was not loud or frequent enough to constitute a significant emergency, he told us. So, as we watched through the glass doors as others streamed out of the building, Carman raised his voice and frantically tried to continue his lecture on Bourdieu over the commotion. A few minutes into this, he stepped back and stoically declared that he was beginning to question the wisdom of our procedure.

I love this man.

Hillary Clinton Has a Blog Adviser.

Squirrel Sets Fire to Dartmouth...

...and in unrelated rodent news...Don't Go Barefoot Anywhere Anymore

Eminent Domain Still on the Table. Suburbia Still Not for Judy Zuhusky.

Meanwhile, is there an opinion section today?

And God said, let there be opinion:

"Who the fuck takes cabs?"

Fascist Columbia bureaucracy to violate Facebook privacy of left-wing fascists in investigation of attack on right-wing fascists.

After action, students to think.

Minutemen! Minutemen! Minutemen! Minutemen! Minutemen! Vaccinations!

You're all gonna die, says fire safety chief

A little known facility you probably have no use for closes.

Overheard outside East Campus during the second fire alarm of the night, 'round midnight:

"My entire suite is still in there!"

To departing firefighters: "Sorry it wasn't real,.."

Guy walking by the crowd outside EC: What's this for?
Bystander: It's a fire alarm.
Guy walking: Oh. Fuck that shit.

Bwog has also heard that three fire alarms in the last week have come from the same suite on the 12th floor. We don't want reasons, folks. Only justice.

Today at about 9:15 AM, the fire alarm in Hamilton went off for the second time in as many days. Students who had just arrived at class left their lessons, filed out the doors, waited around sleepily for about 5 minutes, and then went back inside when they realized the coast was clear.

Apparently, the building was not actually on fire. Which, while good news for the university overall, seems hard to believe when put in the context of Columbia's new policy of no false alarms. Ever.

Bwog cannot help but feel that the University Administration has lied to us with this new ad campaign. Still, for the record, we have no problem with false fire alarms in academic buildings during pleasant Spring days. It's those early Friday morning bell tests in residence halls that really need to be done away with.