40s

It's 2pm the next afternoon and seniors are just starting to hungoverly roll out of bed. Notice we didn't say "their" bed.

The Senior Dinner crowd last night was a mixture of the excellent (our friends) and the obnoxious (everyone else). A series of speakers were ignored until Quigley appeared on stage. Launching into one of his characteristic speeches, he reminded us that "While it may be love that makes the world go round, wine makes it go around twice as fast" and that "When an employment ad asks for a Harvard grad or the equivalent, that means two Princeton grads, three Penn grads, or a Columbia grad part-time on the weekend." Ha-cha!

Soon, however, the speeches were over, and we got down to the business of eating. Just kidding. We actually wandered around the the tent saying disingenuous hellos to freshman floormates, only to return to seats which had been long cleared of our uneaten food. Damn.

In the spirit of cross-class communication, the Bwog is proud to conclude this post with our very own set of Senior Dinner rules. For you, children. For you.
  1. Heed the "no spike heels because they'll sink into the grass" email warning. Especially if you are fat.

  2. Don't get caught stealing wine from Bwog's table.

  3. Don't worry about wolfing down your dessert. The ice cream somehow has the property of not melting. After 30 minutes of observation, Bwog's dining partner concluded that this is creepy.

  4. Laugh at Quigley's jokes. It makes him grin like a foolish British schoolboy.

  5. Get hammered. The whole thing goes down much easier that way.

From a senior class e-mail:
SENIOR FUND
First, for those of you who have graciously given to the Senior Fund thanks so much for your help. Your donation is helping Columbia to keep its high levels of academic rigor, maintain our diverse club interests and eradicate financial aid! [italics added]
Um? Bwog just paid somebody to take AWAY financial aid? Balls.

About Us

Bwog is compiled by the staff of The Blue and White, Columbia University's undergraduate magazine.

Contact Us

Please send tips to bwgossip@columbia.edu.

Questions or concerns? Email bweditors@columbia.edu.

Bwog is always looking for new writing talent. Email bwog@columbia.edu.

In Print

Search

Comment Policy

Our Favorite Comments

don't worry...: [read]
"this is columbia: your virginity will grow back"
omg: [read]
"I understand nothing about money except that I need to marry rich, but I love Jim Cramer"

Bwogroll

Technical

Our headlines are syndicated through Atom.
This site is powered by the Publicate Content Management System, which is available for free.
Our interface icons are from the free Silk set.