Besides all of your wonderful tips, the bwgossip alias gets plenty of spam. Bwog staffer David Iscoe decided to respond to a few, as various permutations of himself. Inexplicably, he didn't hear back.

R obt Herman
<ilnggob@caseyfamilyservices.org>
Date Sep 11, 2007 8:04 PM
chiropractors mailing list

For the week ending Sep 14, you will receive a List for Nursing Homes, Hospitals and Dentists at no additional cost when you order the Physician Database

Licensed Physicians in the USA
788,326 in total — 17,400 emails
34 primary and secondary specialties
16 different sortable fields
Specially reduced price: $353

*** Get the 3 databases below as a bonus when you order the MD list above ***

email to: docbizdata@hotmail.com]
------------------------------------------------------------------
Sep 12, 2007 1:11 AM
Re: chiropractors mailing list

Dear Mr. Robot Herman,

Our organization is very interested in the physicians database. It is not clear from your e-mail what contact info would be included in this database: however, this is not our major concern, since we primarily want the list of names. Many of our members are aspiring physicians themselves, and want to be sure that there are no doctors operating in their chosen field who already have the same name. That sort of thing just causes confusion.

However, before we consider buying the database, we'd like some assurance that the doctors are indeed real doctors. Therefore, we ask you to send us 10 names, so that we can research them to ensure their veracity. At least one should specialize in orthopedic surgery, and two should be from California.

Thanks,

David Iscoe
Information Specialist, Bwog
(212) 221-5623

PS: Would it be possible to get a version of the database without
Irish doctors?

Since Bwog has been designated as the unofficial Zvi-mail chronicler, here's another gem from our outgoing buddy at SEAS.

Hi All

In the first day of teaching evaluations we already have over 22%. Since we have about 10 days to do it, I expect to have participation be well over 200%.

So please do it soon, and win an iPod.

Thank you

Dean Galil

It's the kind of email where you're not sure if the grammar is right or wrong...

The Bwog is pissed at whoever this loser is trying to get naked pictures of Columbia girls over AIM. Mostly because the Bwog really does have a naked picture photo assignment due, and now nobody believes us. We know you do, though. Just send those pictures on in to bwgossip@columbia.edu and we'll make sure they get to the appropriate parties. Er, professors.

Offical public safety warning past the cut:

From a senior class e-mail:

SENIOR FUND
First, for those of you who have graciously given to the Senior Fund thanks so much for your help. Your donation is helping Columbia to keep its high levels of academic rigor, maintain our diverse club interests and eradicate financial aid! [italics added]

Um? Bwog just paid somebody to take AWAY financial aid? Balls.

An anonymous tipster reports an equally anonymous Columbia student who is using Facebook profiles to find girls' screen names. Once he finds an appropriate screen name, the aforementioned student logs on under a false screen name—OneSweeetgurlie—and pretends to be a dear friend from home, all in an attempt to get a picture. Transcript of an actual conversation after the jump.

For those not fortunate enough to be on the SEAS mailing list, Dean Zvi "Spam Robot" Galil sent this to the entire engineering school late last night:

Hi All,

I thought you would like to know that early wednesday morning, shortly
after 1AM the time and date at that very second will be:

01:02:03 04/05/06

I hope you will be be up at that time to mark the occasion of a lifetime.

Dean Galil

Oh, we will, Dean Galil. We will.

Bwog was idling around, and then it received this email from the Columbia Musical Theater Society:

CMTS Presents Andrew Lippa's
THE WILD PARTY

Roone Arledge Auditorium
March 23 - 11 pm
March 24 - 8 pm
March 25 - 7 & 11pm

$5 CUID / $8 GA

For ticket reservations, please email cu.wildparty@gmail.com
Please be aware that this show contains mature themes not
suitable for all audiences.

View the trailer!

Note to those who check out the trailer--"mature themes" is not a codeword for nudity. There's some really great mock-fellatio, though.

In CCSC's weekly email to the Columbia College student body:

______________________________
___________________
1. FREE FOOD tonight
2. Dean's Day Closing Reception
3. Run for Student Council
4. How do you feel about Coke?
5. CC/Lit Hum Graduate Student (Preceptor) Teaching Award
6. Columbia College Days is coming. . .
7. Housing Satisfaction Survey
8. Party For a Purpose ! Join the RELAY FOR LIFE 2006!
______________________________
___________________

If you wanna know how I feel, it's overpriced and gives me sinus problems all day.

From the CU Snacks midterm mass email:

Take a study break and relax with a pint of your favorite Ben and Jerry's ice cream.

A pint of Cherry Garcia contains only 22 grams of Saturated Fat. (That's 110% of your Recommended Daily Allowance.)

At least you get 4% of your Vitamin A.

CU Snacks to World: Hey Fatty!

CU Snacks is kind of like that spaghetti pot they sell on TV with the drainer built into the lid: it's a good idea but it solves a problem you never really had. Plus you're pretty sure only White trash orders it.

Don't believe us? Fresh baked cookies delivered to the West End. Kind of makes sense... until it doesn't.

From CU Snacks' (bi-)weekly email:

Also new this week; Snacks @ the 'Stend. No one likes to put the
party on hold because of hunger, neither do we. Now you can get
delicious snacks like Smucker's Uncrustables PB&J, Ben and Jerry's
ice cream, fresh baked cookies, and 5 cheese grilled cheese
sandwiches delivered to you at The West End. Just deposit munch
money before you go out, then call 212-853-FOOD from The West End,
and we'll deliver. It's the most convenient way to snack at a
party.

For real.

Information Session
Thursday, March 2, 6:30 p.m.
RSVP online at The School of Continuing Education website.

We all just got sold out to the man. As "'required by U.S. law (Title 13, United States Code, Sections 141, 193, and 221),'" Columbia Housing and Dining has turned over the names and addresses of two dormfulls of students to the Census Bureau. Expect the men in black to come a'callin' tomorrow.

Fun fact: Census takers can't argue with any self-reported information. Tell them you're a 65-year old black woman and have a chance to screw-up New York City demographics for good.

Original email after the jump.

Rabbi Yonah Blum has invited you to a dinner party hosted by Chabad @ Columbia.

Who: Chabad @ Columbia
What: Going Mental on Shabbos
When: Friday, February 24
Where: Chabad at Columbia University

One would think that oscar-winning documentarian Ric Burns, C 78, had satisfied his propagandistic and masturbatory urges with his documentary for CU 250 festivities, Columbia: A Celebration. Not so! He's back for more, producing what's being pitched as a "reality-like" film, about his Alma Mater. And it's going to be narrated by Brian Dennehy! Yay! But not in a clown costume! Boo.

On Friday, a film crew will be shooting at the men's basketball game v. Brown university. They'll be conducting interviews with students, and Columbia admins have been sending out crazed e-mails to get ultra positive people to show up and spout platitudes about "your unbelievably POSITIVE Columbia experiences, your nostalgic times in Morningside Heights... We'll get you on camera and if you are energetic, have good junk to say, and most importantly, you look good, you get your 5 seconds of fame and film credit."

After the jump, the complete e-mail:

Will Snider reports:

Part of an email ("South Field Soundbites") from Amanda Atkinson, Assistant Director for First Year Housing:

In this issue you will find information about:

First Year Series Events

Discussion: Abortion in the Caribbean